Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Have You Registered YOUR Safeword Card?



One of the beauties of being a former Citi employee is that they still send me moronic corporate emails. Some are works of subtle comedic genius, like the quarterly earnings announcements where VikiP talks about how they've raised the capital ratio and how this means that the bank is incredibly strong -- without mentioning that he's said this for 6 straight quarters. Then there are the ones from Corporate Communications* that seem to be written solely for an audience of smartasses. This is one of the latter:

Subject: Registering Your Safeword Card

At Citi, we understand the importance of providing alternative and flexible work solutions, and the opportunities they bring to employees and our company.

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Um, what kind of alternate work solution requires a safeword?

* Motto: Bringing you Citi news only minutes after it leaks to the press!

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